1. Let’s start with the classic: What’s your worst, funniest, or most awkward period story?

Probably the most embarrassing was when I was a teenager, I said to my Mum I needed more pads, when she was in the lounge with my Dad and brother. She thought I was meaning writing pads and it took me about 10 minutes to tell her discreetly that I meant period pads.

2. What have you demystified about your female body that you wish you knew when you were younger?

That my pain tolerance is really high, so when suffering from things like period pain, it actually was that bad.

3. Have you been diagnosed with a women’s health condition (like endometriosis, PCOS, PMDD, etc.)? If so, how did you know something wasn’t right, and what was your journey like to get answers?

Yes, I’ve just been diagnosed with Endometriosis this year.

This has been a whole journey, spanning years, so it makes sense to start right at the beginning. I got my period when I was in standard 3 (so around 10-11), so that was quite early. I recall sitting in the bottom of the shower in pain whenever I had my period, and it was always quite heavy. But, back then it was a mixture of thinking it was normal, but also not really talking about it with your Mum or friends. I went on the pill when I was 13 and that made my experience so much better! I tried the depo injection when 16, and ended up having my period for 6 months, so went back on the pill. There was a time when I skipped my placebo pills for a couple of months, and ended up in the hospital with heavy bleeding, where they told me it was just because I had skipped a few months of my period.

My husband and I decided to start trying for a baby when I was 32, and got pregnant in 2019. Everything was healthy and we had a strong heartbeat at 8 weeks. At 12 weeks I started bleeding, and was a bit crampy, however my midwife said a bit of bleeding is normal, and moving the 13 week nuchal scan forward would just make my cramps worse. I was quite worried, given this was my first pregnancy, but listened to her. I remember standing up from the couch and feeling a gish of blood, but it was a Sunday, and our scan was booked for the next day, so decided to follow the midwifes advice and just wait. At our scan, there was no heartbeat.

We left things for a few months, and then continued trying to no avail. Spoke to Fertility Associates and was told that we didn’t qualify for funded treatment, as we had to have been trying for 5 years. So we continued trying. In 2021 we had the money to do privately funded IVF, and started all the tests and appointments. We attempted 3 months of monitored ovulation and 2 rounds of IUI with no result. In the end we had to move to full IVF, where I ended up doing 3 weeks of Stims (stimulating hormones) until they were happy that we had a decent amount of follicles ready. Ended up with 5 eggs collected and 3 fertilised and so started the transfers. The first transfer “stuck” and was developing well, until the 2nd week I think, where it stopped developing and we lost it. I recall that my periods during these times were quite heavy. Then my period was late and I had a pregnancy confirmed by blood test, which we then lost a few days later. Our 2nd egg transfer didn’t take at all, and this was followed by a natural missed miscarriage. At that stage we decided that was enough.

I’ve felt for a long time that things weren’t right, and that although a lot of people don’t succeed in getting pregnant, that there was something wrong.

4. What was your diagnosis experience like?

I’m really lucky, in that I have a fantastic male GP who knows a lot about women (periods, peroi-menopause, pain etc) and also private medical insurance.

Following on from my journey with infertility, and having tried IVF unsuccessfully, I was left thinking “well, why the heck would I still want to have a period every month with the pain I also get?”

Having discussions with my Mum and Sister as well as friends, pointed to a high likelihood of endometriosis.

I decided to see a Gyne Dr Laura Miller that I knew from FA that practiced privately (am I allowed to name names?). Her clinic also has Afterpay which makes paying for appointments easier.

My GP also put in a referral to the womens clinic at Waikato Hospital, and I received a letter from them within 1 week saying I didn’t qualify to go on the list for an appointment.

My initial consultation with her included all of my medical history again (see above), and the standard blood tests to be done, as well as an ultrasound.

The ultrasound was an interesting experience; I always drank water and felt like needing to pee, and before every ultrasound I’ve ever had, I did a small pee. When I went in, she said there wasn’t enough in my bladder to see (although I drank 1L of water), so she also did a vaginal one. These were never really painful for me, so no issues there.

At my follow up appointment with Dr Miller, she told me the findings that there was no sign of endo from my scans etc. After discussing what my wishes were, even without finding any endo, she agreed to do the hysterectomy, but I had to either do a private counselling session via FA, or one with someone else before she could do it. She knew from our consultations that my husband and I were certain, but said she has to tick boxes and that is one of them. 

Counselling was interesting, given that she asked my husband if he was ok with me having a hysterectomy; although I understand why that question would be asked, it actually shouldn’t bear any weight to MY decision.

I was then booked for surgery earlier in 2025 and I was so happy to finally be done with the pain, periods and to close a chapter in my life.

When I woke up from surgery, the first thing I asked my husband was if they found endo and his answer was “YES”. I believe that I said “yay” and went back to sleep.

When Dr Miller came in to see me the next morning she let me know that she did in fact find endo, and I cried. I recall saying to her that I felt validated that there was something wrong all along and she agreed. Showing me the pictures, she explained that although she didn’t find alot of endo, it was adhering my left ovary to my bladder and also multiple spots on my bowel. 

Apparently the pulling sensation/cramping I felt on the left side was because of the endo adhering my ovary to my bowel. Along with that, she said I would now be able to toilet (pee) normally because the endo was gone and I may see a change in my bowel habits as well.

5. How has your condition changed your daily life?

Honestly, having a hysterectomy has changed SO much.

Previously I had to count days, to work out when I need to prepare having my period undies ready, or carry 5+ pads and extra tampons in my handback, car, and travel bag just in case. I always had a hot water bottle ready to use on the couch, and 1 at work to use while sitting at my desk, for a week before, during and after my period.

I no longer have the horrible pulling sensation on my left ovary and I can go hours without needing to pee, even when I drink litres of water and hot drinks.

6. What symptoms made you think something wasn’t right with your body?

My periods were always heavy for 1 day and then stopped, and by heavy I mean, nearly a full packet of pads each time. I even went for the AWWA heavy period undies and would have to change at least twice (although nicer than using tampons or pads!). I also had a lot of pain; my left side ovary always felt like it was pulling, and my right ovary would cramp before, during and after my period, along with cramps from my uterus.

It took years to connect the dots, even though 3 of my close friends have bad endo, I never associated my pain with anything like what they suffered.

My Physio and back surgeon had also asked me if my back got more painful when I had my period; my answer was always yes, but again, ever thought anything of it.

7. Have you tried anything that has helped you manage your symptoms?

I was always quite active (particularly after my back surgeries), working out every day, so that never made a difference to me. Add to that, my pain relief for my long-term back pain, kind of eclipses anything I would take for period pain.

A hot water bottle was really the only thing that helped me.

My husband and friends; talking to them, having understanding from them made a huge difference.

8. What’s one thing you wish more people understood about women’s health?

That just because it can’t be seen doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

9. If you could tell younger you one thing about your body, what would it be?

To listen to others experiences and relate it to your own.

10. When your body feels hard to live in, how do you take care of yourself?

Try not to live in my head and don’t blame my body.

I cuddle my dogs, I talk to my husband, and I do things I enjoy (whether that’s taking a bath, reading a book, going to visit friends, whatever).

11. Miscellaneous musings:

I know my body really well; the things it can do, the things it can’t and the things that don’t feel good. Everyone should know the same; that way when things aren’t right, YOU know.

My body has been through a lot; 4x back surgeries, random injuries, IVF, miscarriages, and it’s easy to hate it sometimes. BUT, it’s carried me through a lot, and I try to remember to be grateful for it.

Music helped me through all the dark and tough times; for me it’s like core memories and experiences are linked to music. Here are a few (and some are kind of dancy since I like dance/rave music), that might help someone else.

The power is here now by Alexia Challun. I listed to this before every IVF app.

On a good day by Above and Beyond. This helped me feel strong even though I was falling apart.

Blink by Simon Patterson. I felt like I only grew a baby for a blink of time.

You’ll be ok (acoustic) by Gareth Emery.

The air I breathe by Richard Durand. This reminds me about my husband, marriage.