What was your diagnosis experience like?

In January 2026, my partner and I found out we were pregnant! We both knew we wanted to start a family, it felt like the right time and it came relatively easy. The excitement was building, we told our families who all shared our same excitement. Until it all came crashing down when I reached 7 weeks. I was experiencing what I never ever could have imagined happen to me, a miscarriage. 

What symptoms made you think something wasn’t right with your body?

Before I experienced a miscarriage, all I knew were dramatic movie scenes where a gush of blood would suddenly fall from a woman’s body. Mine started with a few days of very light spotting, to which I was reassured by my midwife that it can happen in early pregnancy. I had an emergency ultrasound and saw our little baby’s heartbeat flickering. This gave us reassurance, we felt relieved. But within the next few hours, that spotting turned into intense cramping and I landed in ED. From here it was a drawn out waiting game. We were told that it was uncertain if I had indeed miscarried. We would need two blood tests over 48 hours to confirm the findings. That time was rough - emotionally, physically and mentally. The complete unknown. Unfortunately, my results showed my hCG in my blood had dramatically fallen confirming I had miscarried. 

How has your condition changed your daily life?

I found moving forward post miscarriage very tough. Trying to continue life like nothing had ever happened. I felt so angry that everyone’s lives around me were carrying on as usual, when all I wanted was the world to stop and grieve with me. Seeing pregnancy announcements was triggering. I felt so angry, constantly questioning why me? What did I do wrong? What did I ever do to deserve this? 

What have you demystified about your female body that you wish you knew when you were younger?

That the journey of fertility/conception is not linear for all. It is so much more complex that I ever could have imagined. Everyone’s journey looks completely different, and what we see in social media is most definitely a highlight reel. I keep reminding myself that. 

What were the things that helped you through your miscarriage journey?

I found comfort in those who have chosen to share their miscarriage experiences. I knew no one personally around me that had ever been through this. I definitely felt a sense of embarrassment, like my body had failed me. I quickly learnt that the statistics show 1 in 4 women experience miscarriage! People are afraid to talk or approach the subject, yet it is happening all around us everyday. I think we need to be having more open conversations around miscarriages and scrapping the taboo around it. 

What advice would you give to those experiencing similar?

Allowing yourself to feel the emotions, cry when needed - let it out! Check in on your partner too, although us women experience the physical symptoms, they too are experiencing the emotional rollercoaster that is miscarriage. Miscarriage Support NZ Facebook group is a useful page to hear from lots of other women experiencing miscarriage.